Berry Cream Pie (paleo and vegan)

paleo berry pie paleo pie vegan berry pie mini pie cute pie

If there’s one thing that I’m infamously bad at, it’s time management. I have a huge calendar right by the apartment door and I have to write stuff in big letters or else I’ll forget about it. And don’t get me started on my poor, abused daily planner. 

The wedding is less than three months away and there’s still so much to do. My aunt, who is pretty much a wedding expert, has this huge list for us and we’re trying to make sure everything gets done on time. We have all the big stuff taken care of, but we’re trying to nail down the details. Honey, I really don’t care what your dad wears. No, mom, I still haven’t found comfortable shoes yet.

Aaaaand the lady who sold me my dress assured me that there would be cloth leftover from hemming to make me some sleeves and there isn’t. So I might not have sleeves, which I had my heart set on. Plus, I’m going back to school and classes start two days after the wedding. So I have to get everything all set for that too.

paleo pie berry pie vegan pie gluten free pie crust cream pie

All this wouldn’t be a problem if I weren’t so terrible at planning.  (Why am I still writing, there are other things I should be doing right now.)

Luckily, this pie comes together lickety-split.

Mix, bake, mix, pour, refrigerate. DONE.

Now excuse me while I go find a mini pizza box to put the rings in. We’re having the ring bearer carry that instead of a pillow, as an ode to BGE’s pizza worship. Thanks to Jocelyn over at Inside Bru Crew Life for the idea!

paleo pie berry pie vegan pie mini pie berry pie cream pie gluten free pie crust

Berry Cream Pie

Ingredients

    for the crust
  • 1 banana
  • 1 to 1 1/4 cups of fine almond flour (it depends on how ripe your banana is. The greener is is, the less flour you'll need. If it's on the riper side, you'll need more flour)
  • 1/4 tsp baking powder
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • for the filling
  • 1 1/4 cups frozen blueberries
  • 1 1/4 cups frozen raspberries
  • 1 can of chilled coconut milk
  • 16 dates
  • pinch cinnamon
  • 1/4 tsp vanilla
  • for the optional garnish
  • 1/4 of a banana
  • 1/4 cup fine almond flour

Instructions

    for the crust
  1. Preheat oven to 350.
  2. Mash the banana.
  3. Add 1 cup of almond flour to the banana. If it still seems mushy, add the other 1/4 cup.
  4. Add in the salt and baking soda.
  5. Press crust evenly into a small baking dish (mine was a 23 oz stoneware oval dish, 9 x 6 x 1).
  6. Prick bottom of crust with a fork.
  7. Bake for 18-20 minutes.
  8. Allow crust to cool before continuing.
  9. for the filling
  10. Put the dates in a microwave-safe dish with enough water to cover.
  11. Microwave them 2 minutes and drain away the water.
  12. Puree dates in the blender and set aside.
  13. Microwave the blueberries until just room temp.
  14. Scoop the fat out of the can of coconut milk. Save the water for smoothies or something, you won't be needing it for this recipe.
  15. In a blender combine the blueberries, half of the coconut fat, and half of the pureed dates.
  16. Pour blueberry mix into the cooled pie crust.
  17. Repeat steps 12-14 with raspberries.
  18. Add the cinnamon and vanilla to the raspberries.
  19. You'll notice that there is a lot less raspberry mix than you had blueberry mix, because raspberries hold less water. That's ok -- it's exactly what you want.
  20. Put the raspberry mix into a pastry bag with the tip cut off. Drizzle over the blueberry mix and then run a knife though it to make a swirl pattern.
  21. Put the pie in the fridge to set, about 4 hours.
  22. for the optional garnish
  23. Combine banana and almond flour, shape or cut into little hearts. Bake for 10-12 min at 350.
  24. Allow hearts to cool before putting them on the pie.
http://kitchenwindowclovers.com/berry-cream-pie-paleo-and-vegan/

Carrot Spice Cake Ice Cream

Northern folk, brace yourselves for the impending facepalm.

Last Wednesday, I left work around 2:45. The only other person there was my boss, waiting for her husband to come and pick her up. We told each other to be safe and then I trundled across the parking lot to my car.

I got home at 7 pm.

Because of this:

derp

(photo from WRAL)

I was stuck about a quarter mile back from that, watching the ominous black smoke darken the snowy sky.   Everyone kept pulling off to the side and leaving their cars there and just walking home. If I’d had my running clothes with me, I probably would have ran home, since this happened less than 7 miles from where I live.

But instead, I sat in my car, alternately calling BGE to assure him I was ok, reading, and straining to see if traffic was moving. Which it definitely wasn’t.

The good thing (the really good thing) is that being stuck in traffic for four hours is the worst thing to happen in my life in two years. The worst thing that happened before that was my aunt and grandmother dying within a month of each other. That sort of wrecked me for a bit. And I was stuck in a job that made me miserable.

So I’d say life is going really well. I was even cheery when I got home. (Lie, I was cheery after I hit the bathroom)

I had a hot bath and a huge glass of wine and some buttered bread with a warm kale salad. It was good.

I also made this ice cream! It’s not just any ice cream. It’s low fat and full of veggies. Well, not full, but it has three carrots. Which is more than some other ice creams I’ve made.

As soon as I was warm again, I went right back outside and scooped up some snow to pack up BGE’s mom’s old ice cream maker. It made me feel all Laura-Ingallsy.

It was a perfectly comforting way to end the day. And I did have more wine after that.

 

P.S. Please don’t judge us too harshly. BGE and I are both northern transplants and even we found it hard to drive. The roads just aren’t well plowed and salted.

Carrot Spice Cake Ice Cream

Ingredients

  • 3 carrots
  • 3 cups of unsweetened almond milk, divided
  • 1/4 cup of molasses
  • 1/4 cup tapioca starch
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 1/4 teaspoon lemon zest
  • 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 1 anise star
  • 1 piece of crystallized ginger (use regular ginger for paleo)
  • 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/4 cup shredded sweetened coconut (omit for paleo)

Instructions

  1. Dissolve the tapioca starch in 1/2 cup of the almond milk. Set aside
  2. In a blender, combine the carrots, molasses, ginger, carrots, zest, and cinnamon. Mix well until the carrots are totally liquefied.
  3. Put the carrot mixture and the anise star in a saucepan over medium heat. Cook, stirring occasionally, for about 8 minutes.
  4. Add the tapioca mixture in and continue to cook for about another 8 minutes. Stir often and be careful it doesn't boil over!
  5. Remove from heat.
  6. Stir in the vanilla and baking powder. You may have to vigorously whisk in the powder, as it clumps up some.
  7. Fish out the anise star.
  8. Pour it into your prepared ice cream maker and follow manufacturers instructions.
  9. When it's done, put it into a separate container and top that container with the coconut. It will be the texture of soft ice cream at first, but will get harder overnight. Serve with additional coconut
http://kitchenwindowclovers.com/carrot-spice-cake-ice-cream/

adapted from the Creamsicle Custard

 

 

 

Strawberry Jam Hand Pies

vegan paleo hand pies easy

My fella. He likes his strawberries and he likes his bike.

It’s the middle of winter, which means his strawberries are going to come frozen and his biking is going to be done indoors, on the trainer.

This weekend he started this “race” called “Sufferfest.” Sounds fun, no? Basically you get all these videos from Sufferfest, videos that mimic courses and trails and real bike races. You do nine or something videos over the course of a week. I don’t know the full details, I just know that he’s really excited.

Me? Ha. I hate the treadmill, so there’s no way I’d be on the bike trainer for that long, no matter how many calories I burn. Anyways, I guess it’s good training because Sufferfest’s motto is something like  “I will bust my butt today to kick yours tomorrow.”

Now, I don’t care about beating you….I just want to beat me. Beat my own PR’s. But hey, whatever gets you going. The point is, you can get good bike training in the winter. And even though these strawberries are frozen, they make for jam, er, damn good filling.

The dough is made from the same thing that the soft chocolate bites were. I wanted those to be soft and pillow-like, but this dough needed to be firmer. So I still used just one banana…but added a lot more almond flour.

vegan paleo hand pies

 

I made these as a recovery treat for BGE. He’s rather tall, so he puts away a lot of food after a heavy training session. But I snuck a few for myself, too.

Strawberry Tarts

Yield: 8

Strawberry Tarts

Ingredients

    for the filling:
  • 1 lb of frozen strawberries (unsweetened. ingredient listing says "strawberries" and nothing else)
  • 8 dates, pitted and chopped
  • for the dough
  • 1 banana
  • 1 1/2 cups of fine almond flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • pinch of salt

Instructions

    for the filling
  1. Dump the strawberries in a saucepan and cover. Heat on medium for about 10 minutes, or until strawberry juices start running. I used sliced strawberries. If you're using whole ones, they might take a bit longer to defrost.
  2. While the strawberries are defrosting, chop up the dates.
  3. Add the chopped dates to the strawberries and cover again. Cook for another 8-10 min.
  4. Remove from heat and puree with a hand blender.
  5. Return to heat. Here it gets a little labor intensive....cook on medium, stirring constantly, for 15-18 minutes. You want it to get really really thick.
  6. Once it's super thick, remove it from heat and place in parchment-lined container to cool. You want it all the way cool before you make the tarts.
  7. to make the tarts
  8. Mash the banana
  9. Add the almond flour and mix well.
  10. Add in salt and baking powder.
  11. to assemble:
  12. Preheat oven to 350°.
  13. Divide dough into 8 balls.
  14. Flatten balls to about 3 inches in diameter.
  15. Place about 1 tsp of jam in the center of each dough disk and fold over. Pinch the dough shut with a fork.
  16. Bake for 14 min, flip, then bake for another 2-3 min.
  17. Allow to cool slightly before serving.

Notes

Don't roll the dough. Just shape it with your hands.

You'll have some leftover jam.

edited to add - it works best if the banana still a little green.

http://kitchenwindowclovers.com/oh-jam/